Friday, 20 April 2012

I can't go on. i must go on.

'I can't go on. I must go on. I'll go on.'
-Samuel Beckett's novel 'The Unnameable.' 

When my mom breathed her last , cancer in the brain had overpowered her entire body. She was paralysed by the tumour acting on the essential neural processes of the brain. She lost her voice too among other things. I know she knew her death was imminent but since she had lost her voice she couldn't have said what she wanted to tell and bid me to behave after her. You know how Moms are..all the time whenever she talked about death she told me to be strong and most importantly don't let grief spillover your psyche. Of course she said this quoting a Urdu couplet . The following poem essentially sums up  what she would have said in English.
So why now ..after 1 year and 5 months after her death?..........because i had not found the words which she would have said had she been able to speak !

Remember Me

Do not shed tears when I have gone
but smile instead because I have lived.

Do not shut your eyes and pray to God that I’ll come back
but open your eyes and see all that I have left behind.

I know your heart will be empty because you cannot see me
but still I want you to be full of the love we shared.

You can turn your back on tomorrow and live only for yesterday
or you can be happy for tomorrow because of what happened
between us yesterday.

You can remember me and grieve that I have gone
or you can cherish my memory and let it live on.

You can cry and lose yourself become distraught
and turn your back on the world
or you can do what I want - smile, wipe away the tears,
learn to love again and go on.


David Harkins


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